My sister was going through some old pictures recently and found one I had apparently sent her years ago. She texted me the photo and I laughed when I saw it. It was me in 1976, on stage with a boy band…er…male quartet …I travelled the country with. The longer I looked at the pic the more reflective I became. I had my mopped hair head down, arms folded and was clearly in deep thought. Likely I was just trying to remember the words to the next song, but it could have been more. As I looked at that young man, I had a wave of nostalgia mingled with sadness. What a life it has been. The good, the bad, the ugly and the wondrous.

The life we have lived is not simply history – it is also a mystery. And if we pay attention to our life’s journey…if we “let our lives speak” as the old Quaker saying goes… we can discern a purpose that can guide us through the transitions and liminal spaces we face.

I’ve been thinking and writing about liminal spaces recently. They are the moments when we are not where we were and not yet where we will be. They are the “land between”, ofttimes lonely and confusing seasons in our journey. How do we not lose our courage or minds as we travel through the fog? In my previous post, I pointed to self-awareness as an essential tool. I said…

If ever there was a starting point for navigating the land between it must be practicing the habit of self-awareness. I call it a habit because, for many people, introspection must be practiced. Our heads are spilling over with data and fears and obligations. The noise is deafening. Soul-searching is drowned out by the volume of the whirlwind. Self-reflection, which should be an essential practice, turns into a seldom experienced guilty pleasure.

We must meditate on our thoughts, feelings and behaviors. We have to process our losses, anxieties and longings if we don’t want to get stuck in limbo. To know ourselves is to make better decisions, improve our relationships, increase our self-confidence, set good goals and pray more effectively…all crucial skills for getting through liminal spaces. Oh, and if we don’t pay attention to ourselves, our “bodies will keep the score” and give us warnings about our unexamined lives.

Going one step further, I believe that paying attention should necessarily include a healthy amount of remembrance. We need to let our lives speak, for scattered in those years are breadcrumbs to follow that, in time, reveal a unique purpose. Every person and circumstance from our past has contributed to our calling, even the painful, even the detractors, even the failures. All of it builds upon itself to reveal our greatest potential contribution to the world. And when we grasp that one thing, it is much easier to navigate the confusion of our limbo and enter our new reality with hope.

Here are some questions that can guide you as you remember and construct your life map:

Who are the positive mentors and significant people in your life that have influenced you?  How have they shaped you? What did they inspire you to do with your life?

 Who are the people who have had a strong negative influence on your life and how did they shape you?

 What are the positive life altering times, moments and seasons that have influenced you? How have they shaped you?

 What are the occasions of pain, loss, brokenness or disappointment that have affected you? How have they shaped you?

 What influential communities, groups or organizations have shaped you and how?

Take the time to look at younger you. Between that earlier you and today’s you is a wealth of clues that can reveal a why to live for that will get you to where you need to go.

“We do not learn from our experiences; we learn by reflecting on our experiences.”
John Dewey